"The Iceman Cometh"

 I long to be nostalgic about the days of "the iceman cometh" but it was before my time.

Still, I so wish it was an option for the current day, that a body would deliver ice blocks to an "icebox" at home, and that my household never HAD to rely on plugging a refrigerator in, ever again.

Now don't get me wrong. I love a running refrigerator, that never stops running. That's what I want. I think it's what we all want, long-term reliability--that a "chip" or a "module" or a "motherboard" will not die randomly on us, and usually right after we got the mother of all grocery orders all tucked in.

It's happened to me too often. Mostly at my food business, whereby a cautious operator almost by default HAS to have another refrigerator (or more) running at all times, in case one goes out. Because one WILL go out, setting off an immediate panic about food safety and food loss.

It happened enough that the phobia transferred to the home refrigerator. I have since bought refrigerators (and other appliances) before their time was up, finding homes for the still-good ones and marking my calendar for the "predicted longevity" of the next one.

The "predicted longevity" of the modern day is 5-7 years I hear, while the predicted longevity of an old-fashioned icebox is pretty much defined as infinite, and I should know it pretty much is. 

At one point I tried it. I bought an old icebox in an antique store, wiped up its shelves and polished its pretty oak exterior, made my own ice "blocks" and set the groceries in.

I tried to keep up. Into my "normal" freezer I alternated ice cream pails filled with water for the ice. A drip tray underneath the icebox had to be guarded from overflow, not as easy as you'd think, considering there was an attractive oak lift-shield I liked to keep shut, for pretty. One hour of not staying on top of things and water would stream out onto the maple kitchen floor. 

The insulation on that particular unit might have been worn down; things kept cool but not ice cold.  I would guess the old-timers who really used these iceboxes in consistency would probably say this was the way it was anyway, but it was a step up in their day from fishing the butter crock out of a creek. 

All I could do was try. It might have helped if this experiment didn't take place in the midst of whole days at the cafe, when it was not possible to lift up the pretty shield to see if too much water had collected already. But it was the unreliability of refrigerators there that inspired the icebox at home, so there was that. 

Of course, it didn't take long for me to plug the electric fridge back in. The lesson of the experiment seemed to be that we are a species of weaklings, who view the next great thing as a thing that makes the previous great thing too much of a hassle, too much of an effort.

A few months ago I decided it was time to not risk the time again, that we would have a fridge stocked with plenty and it would die. At the appliance store I only momentarily fancied a bevy of shiny beauties, having soon been told, "There are global shortages and delays right now, and most of these won't come until about June of next year."

That was before Christmas, and it's still not June. So, one-by-one (and just in case) I asked, "What about this one? What about that one?" until each was quickly eliminated, and only two realistic choices of immediacy were left to pick from. I had already initiated the futile discussion of "Is there a unit made anymore that isn't reliant on modern computer parts and would last like the ones in the good old days?" whereby she did say no, and whereby I did inquire if she had a selection of Coleman coolers.

She didn't take me seriously. We found a home for our "old" fridge and ordered the one unit that would come quickly. We are now off to the races, hoping we will make it beyond the finish line of at least seven more years.

In the meantime, I'm still serious. I have a big Coleman on the porch, and I'm not afraid to use it. I wish it looked as charming as the vintage oak boxes that rested outside windows back in the day, the ones that were stocked with renewed chill on the days "the iceman cometh." A body inside the house could just reach out for the milk and butter, no electricity needed.

I'm all for charm, and I'm all for practical. I would love "old" iceboxes to be offered "new" again, and I would love for an iceman to put me on his route. I wish they made cook stoves the way they used to, a "Monarch" that could utilize up to three fuels, warm the house if needed and operate without a plug, too.

In some ways progress has us in regress, I tell you! But if I'm going to look at the bright side, I just got a new fridge, and I'm good to go. For a for a little stretch, anyway.